


Five Things BA Baracus Taught Alec Hardison About Being A Man

by Tygermama



Series: Tygermama's Five Times Fics [4]
Category: Leverage, The A-Team
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-02-17
Updated: 2010-02-17
Packaged: 2017-10-07 08:39:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/63365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tygermama/pseuds/Tygermama
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>see title</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Things BA Baracus Taught Alec Hardison About Being A Man

**Author's Note:**

> **Author:** [](http://tygermama.livejournal.com/profile)[**tygermama**](http://tygermama.livejournal.com/)
> 
> **Beta:** [](http://winks7985.livejournal.com/profile)[**winks7985**](http://winks7985.livejournal.com/)
> 
> **Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the intellectual properties used herein and am not making a profit.
> 
> **Author's Notes:** written for the first fanfic challenge on [](http://community.livejournal.com/ateamfanfic/profile)[**ateamfanfic**](http://community.livejournal.com/ateamfanfic/) In my head, Hardison's Nana isn't that old, looks like Pam Greer and grew up with BA. I just didn't have room for it in the fic :D

** _A Man Knows When To Ask For Help_ **

 

"Stupid, stupid, stupid bike chain." Alec muttered softly, struggling to push his used, piece of shi-crap _Don't you swear, Alec baby, not in my house_, bike home, the chain dangling uselessly. It had slipped off the gears. Again.

"What do I need to know how to ride a bike anyways? Just gonna get stolen…" Alec's skinned knees stung, but not as much as his pride. He felt like everyone who saw him on his bike laughed at him. Ten years old and doesn't know how to ride a bike. Doesn't matter that his mama could never afford to get him one and then the state had decided she couldn't afford to keep _him_. None of the other foster parents could be bothered to see if he could ride a bike. Now he was living with some lady everyone called 'Nana' even though she wasn't that old and when she found out he didn't know how to ride a bike, she made a disgusted noise and dug around in her garage until she found this… This piece of crap-yellow bike with training wheels and a chain that kept slipping off.

"Need some help with that, boy?" a deep voice asked. It was Nana's "friend", BA Baracus. A big, muscular man with the weirdest haircut Alec had ever seen and what looked like Alec's weight in gold around his neck. The first time Alec had seen BA, he figured BA must work out so he could stand carrying all that gold around. And so he could keep it.

Alec managed not to sneer at the man. He had more than enough pseudo "Dad"s and "Uncle"s to last him the rest of his life.

"The chain came off again. You know how to fix bikes?" Alec asked, glaring challengingly at BA.

BA crossed his arms over his chest and looked at the skinny, angry kid in front of him. _God, I used to be just like him. No wonder Jackie called me._ He smirked a little and said, "You asking for my help?"

Alec bristled and pulled himself up straight, he was not going to be laughed at anymore. Not by this guy, or anyone else. But he could still hear Nana's voice in his head, lecturing him to be respectful. He really didn't want to let her down.

Alec sighed and said, "If you know how to fix bikes, yeah, sure, I'm asking for help. If you're just here to make fun of me, you can leave. I'm not here for your amusement."

BA raised an eyebrow at Alec. "Yeah, I know how to fix bikes. Know how to fix just about everything with wheels. I can teach you, if you want."

Alec searched BA's face for any sign that he was being set up for some sort of joke. When he was satisfied that the offer was genuine, he relaxed. "Yes, sir. I would like that."

"Don't need to call me "sir". I work for a living." BA said, squatting down so he could get a better look at the chain. "Looks like we need to clean all this up and maybe tighten the chain a little." He stood up and picked up the bike, holding it up and frowning, "Want to take the training wheels off too?"

"Yes! I hate those things. I'm not a baby!" Alec exclaimed.

"I know you're not a baby, boy. Now, come on. We got to get this bike back to Jackie's garage and get your knees cleaned up." BA put the bike back down and started pushing it towards the house.

Alec stared at him for a minute before shaking his head as he ran to catch up.

 

** _A Man Takes Care Of Himself_ **

 

BA stared in shock through the windshield as he saw Alec run as fast as he could around the corner and across the street, nimbly dodging a bike and a delivery truck.

_Didn't anyone teach that boy not to run in traffic?_

Then three boys in gang colours came running around the same corner and BA understood Alec's need for speed.

"Alec!" BA yelled, getting out of the van and slamming the door behind him.

Alec didn't slow down at all as he turned and started running to BA. The boys behind him followed blindly, not looking to see who was yelling. Alec came straight to the van, skidding to a stop with a thump against its side. He was wheezing so bad BA worried Alec might throw up.

"You're dead meat, Hardison! You never should have stopped…" the leader of the little gang skidded to a stop as BA stepped between him and Alec, arms crossed and a scowl on his face.

"You boys got a problem with my friend here?" BA asked, voice gravelly and hard.

The three were momentarily startled when they saw BA. The head of the pack recovered the fastest while his two followers looked worriedly at each other. The lead punk puffed himself up and glared back, "Yeah, I got a problem with your friend here. Little shit thinks he's smarter than everybody…" He trailed off as his friend grabbed him by the shoulder and whispered fast in his ear.

"_That's_ BA Baracus? How the hell does he know…" The lead punk trailed off, looking concerned for a second before he covered it up with more bravado. He couldn't have been more than fourteen years old. BA sighed inside, wondering why this kid was in a gang and if anything had really changed since he was a kid.

"You Baracus?" the kid asked, chin jutting out.

BA uncrossed his arms and leaned in threateningly, "Yeah, that's me. What's your problem with my boy, Alec, here?" BA hated this. He hated the gangs and the violence and the bullshit. He had hoped that Alec would not get caught up in it. But he knew it would be better in the long run to establish Alec as being off limits now, if that was possible.

"Your boy better start keeping his mouth shut and stay on his side of the avenue if he knows what's good for him." The gangbanger leaned around BA to glare at Alec, "This is your only warning, Hardison. We outta here." He gestured to his friends and they all strutted off, trying too hard to look tough.

BA kept his eye on them until they got around the corner then turned to Alec. "You want to explain to me what the hell that was all about?"

Alec was still struggling to catch his breath, looking a little green around the gills. "I… I blew the curve on the algebra test again. I'm not going to pretend to be stupid so those assholes get better grades."

BA sighed and put his hand on Alec's shoulder, "You okay? Did they hurt you?"

"Nah, they couldn't catch me but, man, was I glad to see you. Not sure how much longer I could have run." Alec said, looking slightly better but still breathing too fast.

"Boy, you got lucky. You expect to survive high school you better start taking better care of yourself. I could take you to the gym, show you some moves." BA offered, thinking it was past time someone made sure the boy knew how to defend himself and that he got some exercise.

Alec grinned his familiar, shit-eating grin at BA and said, "Hey, man, I'm a lover, not a fighter. And Nana says I'm not supposed to fight, leads to too much trouble."

BA groaned and muttered something about 'the jazz' under his breath, "How long you been waiting to use that one? Get in the van. I'm taking you over to the gym. Jackie's right, but you should at least take care of yourself; make sure you got the wind to run all the way home."

"Hey, I've been waiting to use that one my whole life!" Alec said, laughing as he made his way over to the passenger side door. He hopped in the van and did up his seatbelt. His expression grew serious as he watched BA get in and do the same.

"Hey, BA?" he said, sounding like a kid his actual age for a change.

BA grunted as he put the key in the ignition, "Yeah?"

"Thanks."

 

** _ A Man Takes Responsibility For His Actions_ **

 

BA looked at Alec and sighed. The teen was slouching in his chair, arms tightly crossing his chest and an embarrassed and belligerent look on his face. Why Jackie had insisted that _he_ be the one to talk to Alec about this was beyond him. And thanks to the strip she had already torn off the poor kid, Alec wasn't exactly in a listening mood.

_But he did get caught messing around with the head cheerleader. Man, Jackie is going to owe me huge for this…_

"Get up." BA said, walking to the back door.

Alec looked up, puzzled and suspicious, "Where are we going?"

"Out. Be easier on both of us if we don't have this conversation with your Nana listening in."

BA ignored the offended "Hmph!" from the other side of the door to the living room, turned and let himself out the back, trusting Alec to follow.

BA climbed into the van and unlocked the passenger door, patiently waiting for Alec to get in. He thought about all the times he had driven Alec around in this van and tried to figure out where the time had gone. He didn't feel any older but now, here he was, about to give "The Talk" to a kid he had known… Well, obviously Alec wasn't a kid anymore. He turned the key in the ignition and tried to figure out what to say.

"Where are we going?" Alec asked again, still stiff and angry.

_Don't know, just goin' to drive around til I figure out what to say…_ BA thought. What he actually said was, "Sammy's. We can eat while we talk."

Alec harrumphed but stayed silent.

"So…" BA said as he pulled out into traffic.

"So…" Alec said back, copying BA's tone.

"Sex, huh?" BA said, staring straight ahead. _What the hell am I doing?_

Alec made an embarrassed noise in the back of his throat and looked out the passenger window.

BA thought back to all the things he'd been taught about sex as a child and what stuff had turned out to be useful and what had been complete crap. _Here goes…_

"I'm not going to yell at you and tell you not to have sex. That would be stupid." BA began.

Alec started a bit but didn't turn away from the window.

"I'm sorry you got caught and that Jackie ripped you a new one and chased your girl out of the house. I got no clue what she thinks I'm going to tell you that you don't already know, but I do have a couple of questions. Nothing _detailed_, just want to make sure I got my facts straight. You cool?" BA asked, his nerves still jittery.

"If I say it's none of your business, you going to yell and tell me I don't got the right to say "none of your business"?" Alec asked. He turned away from the window, still sounding pissed off and defensive.

"Yeah, that's fair. So, you cool?" BA asked again.

"Yeah, we're cool. Ask away." Alec said, still facing forward.

"Do you love her? What's-her-name?" BA asked.

"What? Mary? No! Wait… Yes? I don't know…" Alec exclaimed. He was clearly surprised by the question and by his answer.

BA shook his head and said, "Relax, kid. Does she know you don't love her? I've known some guys who'll say anything to get a girl in bed and then take off as soon as they get what they want."

"It's not like that! We're just messing around on a study break and things… got out of hand…" Alec said, his voice trailing off at the end.

"That happens. That happens. So you don't love her and she don't love you. That sound about right?" BA asked, still trying to figure out where he was going with this. _Jesus, how does Jackie do this every day? How did Mama?_

Alec shifted in his seat and nodded. "Yeah, that's about right. I didn't lie to her. I promise." He said, looking down at his hands in his lap.

"Well, as long as the two of you know where you stand with each other. I don't ever want to find out you've been treating women disrespectfully, you hear? I find out you've been lying…" BA started to growl.

"Hey! If Nana caught me doing something like that, there'd be nothing left of me for you to pound on, okay? Is that all you wanted to know?" Alec snapped back. He had turned to BA and was glaring at him.

"That's true," BA said. "Next question. Did you have any protection?" He saw an all night pharmacy coming up on the left and changed lanes to make the turn.

"Protection? You mean condoms? Umm…" Alec trailed off and was staring at his hands again.

"If you want to have sex, you gotta take responsibility. Anyone who tells you different is a fool. You could catch something or get the poor girl pregnant. You ready to be a daddy?" BA asked as he pulled into the parking lot. He found a spot and pulled in, killing the engine.

He turned to face Alec and asked, "So, you sure you're really prepared for sex?"

"Prepared? How do you know you're prepared for sex? Is there a test?" Alec asked sarcastically, his eyebrow arched.

BA smiled back and reached into his back pocket. He got out his wallet and handed Alec a twenty. "Here," he said, "Go into that pharmacy and buy some condoms."

"WHAT?" Alec screeched, his voice breaking. The kid looked panicked, eyes wide, mouth hanging open. "What if someone sees me?"

"If you can't walk into that pharmacy and buy condoms without freaking out over someone maybe seeing you and figuring out you might be having sex, then you aren't really ready, are you?" BA said. He leaned in close to Alec and made sure the boy could see how serious he was. "This is about more than just doing something that feels really good. This is about knowing your actions could have consequences and being prepared to deal with them. This is about finding someone you actually care about. This is about being honest and having self-control. You think you can deal with all that? Okay. No one can stop you. But how ready can you be if you can't buy some protection? They're your 'little boys', you're responsible for where they end up. You don't get to say it's the girl's problem. Too many guys do that already. You hear me?"

Alec fingered the twenty in his hand, looking at it and then the pharmacy and back again. "Yeah, I hear you. That's it? That's how you know you're ready?" he asked, frowning at BA, the twenty crumpled in his hand.

"Well, it's a start. There's lots of stuff in life that you're never really prepared for. But at least buying your own condoms good step." BA said. "So, you going in or not?"  
Alec looked up at BA, his jaw clenched. He took off his seat belt and got out of the van, marching determinedly toward the doors.

BA watched him go, shaking his head. _Boy looks like he's marching off to the firing squad._

Alec entered the pharmacy.

Two seconds later, he came back out. The twenty was still in his hand. He got back into the van and handed the money to BA.

"I'm going to think it over first." Alec said, a shaky smile on his face. "I got the time. Mary's probably not going to talk to me again, ever. I'm only seventeen, I'm not ready to be someone's daddy."

BA put the money back in his wallet and started up the van. "So, you hungry?"

"Starved!" Alec said, his stomach growling.

BA put his hand on Alec's shoulder and gave it a squeeze. "I'm proud of you. And if Jackie asks, I put the fear of God into you and you're never going to look at a girl again until you're thirty. Got it?"

Alec laughed. "Yeah, I got it."

 

** _A Man Takes Care Of His Family_ **

 

"Boy! If you're screening your calls, so help me God, I will _end_ you!" BA's voice thundered in Alec's voicemail. Alec frowned in worry; he had no idea what BA was pissed about. Sure there was that whole Iceland thing, but he was sure he hadn't done anything _recently_ that would get the big guy that steamed…

"When you get this message, you call me! Some fool is trying to foreclose on Jackie's house!"

The line clicked as the message ended.

Alec scrambled to hit the speed dial.

No fool was going to take his Nana's house away. No way. No how.

*** *** ***

A few hours later Alec was sitting across the table from BA in a little restaurant the older man had suggested as a place to meet. It had the air of one of those places you never find unless someone tells you about it. The way the owners seemed to follow BA's every move and anticipate what he would need next made Alec think these were some of the people his friend had 'helped' during his wrong-side-of-the-law days. "Okay, so what the hell is going on?" he asked.

"Some land deal is going on. The bank sold a developer the deed to Jackie's house and now he's demanding payment in full or she and the kids are out in the street." BA said through clenched teeth. "I'm thinking they are using Jackie as a example, 'cause I checked and no one else is being harassed yet. And your Nana is not helping things…" BA trailed off, looking furious and a little helpless.

"What she do to piss you off?" Alec asked, trying not to smirk. BA only called Nana that when he was upset about something she'd done. Just like when Alec was a kid and he did something bad, she'd tell BA all about what "his little friend" had done.

"She won't let me help her. Says my money's dirty." BA said, staring into his coffee cup.

"What?" Alec exclaimed, sitting up straight, "You're one of the most honest men I know! What she mean your money's dirty?"

BA sighed and looked up, "Most of my savings is from stuff I did on the run with the team. Jackie won't take it unless I can prove I earned it legitimately. She's worried that someone- the bank, IRS, who knows- might cause trouble if she can prove where the money came from."

"Okay, that's not a completely stupid concern," Alec said, his mind already whirling through the possibilities, "Just don't tell me we have to have the money in the Cook County Assessor's Office by 9am Monday morning or I'm calling shenanigans and walking out."

BA frowned in confusion, "Boy! What the hell are you talking about? Jackie's house isn't in Cook County! And the money needs to be in the bank in three days."

"Seriously? Man, you need to watch more movies." Alec said. He reached into his messenger bag and pulled out his laptop. He booted it up, hoping there was WIFI he could hack into. "Yes! We are on the air! Don't worry, BA, I got this. Just let me move some money around and we can go pay Nana's mortgage off tomorrow."

Alec squawked when BA reached over and smacked him in the back of the head. "This is no time for 'Blues Brothers' jokes, _Elwood_. Now where you going to get that kind of money? We need 33,000 dollars to pay off the note on the house."

"I know you don't exactly approve of what I do for a living, but I thought we settled all that." Alec said, still typing furiously. "But not all my money is made through… non-traditional avenues. I do have a couple completely legitimate businesses based around programs I wrote. I can get the money from them and give Nana absolute proof that I made the money legally. We don't have to get the band back together. Wait… Did you just call me 'Elwood'?"

BA smiled and leaned back, the weight was off his shoulders and now he could stop worrying. "Good, 'cause I've heard you sing and you ain't that good. And, yeah, I called you Elwood. You're the tall, geeky guy with the bag full of stuff."

"Ha. Ha. You're so clever. And I sing great. I make angels cry." Alec said. He clicked a few more keys and closed his laptop with a flourish. "There! All done! No one takes my Nana's house away when there's something I can do about it. We should celebrate! What's good here?"

"Everything is good here. And I know whenever I hear you sing, I want to cry, so I guess that's true." BA said, opening the menu, "And since you're so loaded with all that legit cash, you're buying."

Alec snorted, "Why not? Gotta take care of family, right?"

BA smiled. "You do realize that once Jackie knows about these legal businesses of yours, she's going to want to know why you're still hacking?"

Alec turned pale and swallowed nervously, "Oh, _hell_."

 

** _ A Man Knows When To Ask For Help_ **

 

Leverage was between jobs and everyone was bored.

Nate kept getting mad that the others. They kept finding all the places he hid his liquor and dumping it out but he was smart enough not to say anything.

Tara had taken off, just smiling brightly when Nate asked her where she was going and saying "Shoe shopping". No one believed her but she had her cell, so they knew they could get a hold of her if she were needed.

Parker had changed all the locks three times so far. When the others had complained, she sniffed and told them to be 'better thieves'.

Eliot hadn't stopped baking. They were all going to get fat at this rate. Not that they were really complaining. Making specific requests was more like it.

Then Hardison got a call.

"Hey, long time, man! How are you?" he said.

Nate, Eliot and Parker all stopped what they were doing and listened in shamelessly.

"You do? Really?" Hardison's voice rose in surprise.

"Hey, anything for you." He paused for a few minutes, listening to whoever it was on the other end of the line and 'hmmm'ing occasionally.

"Okay, we're going to need the team for this, I think. You cool with that?" Hardison nodded along to whatever the person on the line was saying.

"You got the address? Great! See you in an hour. Can't wait for you to meet everyone. It's going to be interesting for sure." Hardison chuckled a little.

"Hey, trust me. Bye." He snapped his cell shut and just stared at it for a minute, a delighted smile on his face.

Hardison shook his head, looked up at the others and said, "I think I just found us a job."

"You do, huh? I thought I found us the clients. Who is this person?" Nate asked sarcastically.

Hardison ignored the sass, practically vibrating with excitement. He jumped up and began to pace off his nervous energy. "An old friend. He's an old friend of my Nana's, used to come around and help us out. He taught me everything I know about being a man. And he needs _my_ help!"

"He taught you about being a man? Is that stuff like shaving and peeing standing up and belching the alphabet?" Parker asked, disgruntled. She crossed her arms and glared at Hardison.

Hardison stared at her, in shock, "Just when I think you can't get any… Where do you get this stuff? No, he did not teach me that! He taught me important stuff, like taking responsibility and fixing my bike and taking care of my family! He's a good man and he _asked for my help!_ And if you guys don't want to hear what he has to say, fine, but I'm still going! But first I got to do some research. It's going to take me a while, so you all just take your negativity to the other side of the room."

Hardison grabbed his laptop and flopped down on the couch, pointedly ignoring the others.

"Hey, I'm bored so I'll at least hear the guy out. We're supposed to meet him in the bar in an hour?" Eliot cut in. He took of his apron and shook his hair. "How are we supposed to know this guy?"

Hardison glared over his shoulder at Eliot, "You gonna help?"

Eliot shrugged, "I said I'd hear him out. Not promising anything."

"If I'm not down there, he's easy to spot by his haircut." Hardison said, turning back to his work.

"We'll know the guy by his haircut?" Nate asked.

Hardison looked up at him.

"If the guy means that much to you, it can't hurt to see what he needs." Nate said, shrugging apologetically.

Hardison shook his head and smiled, "Yes, you'll know him by his hair. It's a very distinctive haircut."

"Isn't that your line?" Parker asked, pointing at Eliot.

"It's not like I have it copyrighted, Parker." Eliot said huffily, flopping down in the armchair to watch Hardison work.

*** *** ***

The team had ten minutes left until they were supposed to meet Hardison's mystery client when they stumbled into the bar. Hardison had managed to get most of the research he wanted done before they had to leave, no thanks to the team.

After calling Tara to tell her they had a prospect for a job, they had amused themselves playing "Guess What Else Hardison's Friend Taught Him". The guesses ranged from raunchy (which got Parker banned from further guessing) to just plain silly (although Hardison was proud of his influence on Eliot when the hitter had suggested 'Jedi Mind Tricks')

"How about 'Never draw on an inside straight'?" Nate suggested as they made their way to their regular table to wait.

"Nah. That was Face, but Nana said he could't visit anymore after she caught us playing poker." Hardison replied, not really paying attention to wait Nate was saying as he scanned the crowd.

"There he is! Hey, BA!" Hardison pointed at a large black man, with a very distinctive haircut, sitting at the bar. Hardison rushed over and hugged him, leaving the others gawking.

"That's… Nate, that's BA Baracus." Eliot said. He sounded as close as he ever came to awe.

"Baracus. Baracus… Wait, 'the A-Team' Baracus?" Nate asked as his memory dredged up tales of an elite unit of men on the run from the law.

"Who's the 'A-Team'?" Parker asked, staring at BA.

"I'll explain later. Seems Hardison really has found us an interesting client." Nate said as he made his way over to the bar.

Hardison pointed at the team as they made their way closer. "BA, these are my friends. Nate Ford, Eliot Spencer, and Parker. Guys, this is BA Baracus."

Nate held out his hand and said, "It's an honour to meet you, Mr. Baracus. How can Leverage help the A-Team?"


End file.
